You know how I mentioned the big wildfire up near South Lake Tahoe?

It's still raging and many structures have been destroyed and it really sucks. And residents, especially evacuees and people who have lost structures, are all very upset. Understandably so.

But what's the first thing everyone seems to be doing?

Blaming someone else.

They are blaming the Forest Service for not completing enough prescribed burns. They are blaming the Tahoe Regional Planning Agency for not allowing them to cut trees. They are blaming every agency they can name.

WTF?

You live in a FOREST. According to experienced fire fighters, these are the driest conditions that have seen for 40 years. You can't blame anyone for that (well, I'm sure people can). One woman came on the news last night and explained that she did cut out 100 feet (or is it yards..?) of defensible space around her home, and her home did not burn. Some residents may blame the Forest Service or other government agencies for not letting them cut trees, but I'm sure many residents never tried to clear trees and brush away from their houses. How do I know? They showed one house on the news that had a huge pine tree as one corner of their patio deck. Intentionally built into the house. Very pretty. But it's a tall freaking pine tree with pine needles right above your house. I understand not wanting to cut away all the trees around your house when you live in a beautiful forest. But why scream blame at someone else when this kind of uncontrollable accident happens? Why are we always looking for someone to blame?

I've admitted that I would be devastated if my entire home was destroyed. I don't mind people being distraught. But why, why is it - the first thing they do is have a meeting and scream at public agencies? Are they trying to set up their lawsuit cases already? Or are they just trying to redirect all their personal frustration on someone else, as if that will assuage their own grief? Why not focus on yourself, and your family, and concentrate on getting your insurance payments (you were insured, right?). Why add grief upon grief by screaming at everyone else, when YOU LIVE IN A FOREST and everyone *says* they were expecting this type of fire at some time or another? Why distract yourself with more reasons to be upset and angry? Why not at least wait until the fire is controlled and officials can concentrate on what you have to say, rather than have to deal with a raging mob who points blame before the final ember is extinguished? No one likes a raging mob.

I think that, sometimes, I become too attached to things. Things, such as ideas that I have. And things, such as physical objects. How do I know the second is true?

I have a house-full of "stuff" in Maui, half a room-full of "stuff" at my mom's, and an entire rented storage container of "stuff" waiting for me (plus one couch that my future MIL (mom-in-law) is holding for me). Yeah....it's hard for me to let go of stuff.

The Dalai Lama, on his own website, says the following about attachment:

According to Buddhist psychology, most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for and attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities. The pursuit of the objects of our desire and attachment involves the use of aggression and competitiveness as supposedly efficacious instruments.

The Dalai Lama talks about attachment quite a bit. I should think about it more myself. I think too much attachment to stuff, including my own brain-full of notions, is sometimes detrimental.

Why do I think about this now? My nephews were playing in my mom's house tonight before dinner and broke one of Mom's Hummels. Now, I know what you're thinking, but my mom is not one of those people that has dozens of Hummels lined up on every inch of flat surface in her house. She only has a small handful, and two of them were from her mother. It was one of those moments where I could see it happening across the room and knew there was no way I could leap across a table, two chairs, and a piano bench in time to stop it.

It was a sad thing. But you know, I think I was more upset about it than Mom was. Maybe because of her typical low-key reaction to things. Maybe because, as she said later, "There's nothing you can do about it." And maybe because Mom just doesn't get as attached to "stuff" as I do.

My nephews were upset also. But what happened was truly an accident, and they weren't really playing in a manner that is not allowable in the house. It was just an accident. And here's where a good example came in. My Big Sis handled it like a pro. Which, hey, I think she is. She's been a mom long enough to know when something bad is an accident versus when she needs to really get to the bottom of what her kids are doing. Despite having something hot on the stove, and having me sitting on the floor lamenting the headless Hummel, she handled the situation calmly and finished making dinner. She knew the boys understood something wrong had happened - there was nothing she could add to that feeling. And she knew nothing had happened out of ill intent. She didn't lash out at the boys, or even at me for sitting on the floor like a lump. Our mom didn't lash out at anybody or even ask who was responsible or how it happened. She just said "Well, let's glue it back together."  And I think both moms were very Dalai-Lama-like tonight by their patience, calm, and compassion. The moment of stunned silence around the broken figurine probably gave my sister enough time to say a prayer to help her. A few extra moments gave me enough time to try and re-engage my oldest nephew who still looked crestfallen about the whole thing. I wish I had been able to gather myself as quickly as my Big Sis did (although she did scald herself cooking, so maybe she wasn't as composed as she looked). But, I'm trying.

Tonight, Mom and I watched the news about a big fire up near Lake Tahoe. By 11:00 p.m., over 150 homes had been destroyed in this fire. I thought how much worse that would feel than just losing one family keepsake. But then I thought about how miserable I would feel if my own home were completely destroyed. While I don't think I'd be too off the mark to be sad about something like that, I still need to learn more about letting go of some of my attachments. I won't even get into the problems that come about because I've become too attached to an idea in my head. It's generated more arguments (many with my patient Sweetie) than I can count. And it often comes down to, I need to let things go sometimes. Hopefully, with more study, lots more prayer, and more good examples in my life, I can improve on that. Maybe. Someday?